madnovel Chapter 60 I am your destiny!
Chapter 60 I am your destiny!
The speech draft tucked in the diary was originally torn to pieces, but it was painstakingly pieced back together with tape.
It's like someone accidentally receiving a hundred-dollar bill that's about to be torn up. Afraid of not being able to spend it, they take some tape, precisely align the torn part of the bill, and then seal it with tape.
The wrinkles on the speech have been smoothed out as much as possible, but you can still vaguely see Tian Xiwei's anger from back then.
Li Shen began to read it; it was a standard speech draft for a graduate representative.
The opening remarks pay tribute to leaders and teachers, then mention the alma mater that has nurtured them and the teachers who have taught them with earnest guidance... and then express feelings about the fleeting time and the passing years, recounting the gains made during the four years of university.
The first few hundred words contained nothing that surprised Li Shen; it was clearly copied from a template.
Then, the article begins to express gratitude in batches. One paragraph thanks family, the next thanks teachers, and then thanks classmates.
When Li Shen's gaze fell on the next line, his reading speed suddenly slowed down infinitely.
I want to thank him. He has a pure and kind heart, outstanding talent, and an incredibly forgiving soul. He is my first love, Li Shen. May we weather any storms together in the future!
This simple paragraph, only about 60 words long, contains no grand vows, no excessive sentimentality, and none of the awkwardness found in youth films where the female lead tries to move the world with her romance.
Tian Xiwei simply listed it in a separate paragraph, using about 60 words, to give a brief account.
But Li Shen knew what this simple statement meant.
For young female artists, the most feared thing is having their relationship exposed, and this is especially true for someone like Tian Xiwei who has a sweet image.
Therefore, it's common for young actresses in the Chinese entertainment industry to create romantic pairings, but they are rarely willing to provide concrete evidence.
The general public may not realize it. But those in the industry understand that these simple 60-odd words are filled with the courage of a female artist.
She was willing to suffer setbacks in her career just to make her relationship public.
Li Shen couldn't bear to read the rest of the speech.
He pressed his head down, carefully considering the events of the days leading up to the graduation ceremony between the lines.
By the time they graduated, Tian Xiwei had already gained some fame, but their relationship was still kept secret, known only to a few of her roommates.
Of course, nothing stays hidden forever; the whole school knew about the rumor, but no one had any concrete evidence.
As for the outside world, virtually no one knows about it.
It's very difficult for an ordinary person to date a female celebrity. The original owner and Tian Xiwei dared not walk side by side on campus, nor did they dare to go back to their home off campus together. They had to try to avoid any situation that could lead to the exposure of their relationship. Even when they went to eat in the cafeteria, one of them would be on the first floor and the other on the second floor.
This relationship was both sweet and cautious for the original owner of the body.
A few days before graduation, they had another argument.
The reason is that Tian Xiwei saw the potential for development in the short drama genre and hoped that Li Shen would write and direct his own dramas. She was willing to invest all her income in him.
The original owner of this body was cautious and hesitant to try new things, which infuriated Tian Xiwei. She said he lacked the courage to try and never strived for anything. She wanted him to realize his potential, and being with him was exhausting for her. The original owner also mentioned that he was tired of having a secret relationship with a female celebrity.
Then came another Cold War.
During the Cold War, agent Chen Lan approached Li Shen, bringing with her the agency's stance: advising him to break up.
Graduation is here, and it's time for everyone to go their separate ways.
Their social statuses were too disparate; one was a rising star actress, and the other was a screenwriter whose talent had long since faded. They were from completely different worlds and should never have been together.
Many of these things were not things Li Shen remembered on his own, but rather things he gradually learned by asking Tian Xiwei.
If he really couldn't remember something, he would just ask directly, too lazy to guess.
"Have I run out of creative ideas?"
"Yeah. Those really good scripts of yours were all written during your senior year of high school. You're like the Korean version of screenwriters. But you didn't achieve much in college, all because you were addicted to the internet."
Li Shen pointed to himself: "Me, addicted to the internet?"
"Um."
"Let me think, what have I been doing while I'm addicted to the internet?"
Despite his internet addiction, at least one thing is clear: he met Li Hangliang and even helped him write lyrics for several songs.
Li Shen sighed, "So, the moment I resolutely decided to break up was also the moment you mustered the courage to announce our relationship?"
Tian Xiwei did not answer.
After a long silence.
Tian Xiwei suddenly asked, "Li Shen, what's wrong with your memory?"
"I've explained it to you before, but actually, I can't really explain it either. It seems to have some logic, but sometimes it doesn't quite make sense. Just treat me like a stranger."
I, a stranger, have entered your life, and occasionally, in my memories, I glimpse your past.
"Strangers? You can use that excuse to throw a tantrum and act like a child forever," Tian Xiwei paused, then added, "to your friends."
Li Shen sighed, "So far, besides Brother Liang and you, I have no other friends in this world."
"Oh, I'm honored! Hello, friend."
Seeing Tian Xiwei extend her small, fair hand to him, he slapped it away: "Tian Xiwei, I didn't sing you the song I dedicated to you in front of you, did I?"
"W-What do you want to do? Let me tell you, I'm very strong!"
Li Shen looked at her suspiciously: "Why are you so nervous? What do you mean by being strong? Go to the piano student and get the guitar."
"Li Shen, I'm actually really frustrated today because you kept asking me all sorts of questions. I've thought about all the things that make me unhappy, so why should I listen to you?!"
Tian Xiwei protested with a stern face.
Li Shen frowned at her: "Does my word not carry weight?"
"What makes your word count?"
"If my words don't carry weight, then does it?"
Li Shen suddenly pulled a small 252g can of yellow peaches from his pocket and slammed it onto the table with a bang.
He bought this at the supermarket while buying breakfast.
Tian Xiwei's big, dark, adorable eyes lit up instantly: "Mommy said we can't eat things given by strangers!"
"Eat it or not, it's up to you!" Li Shen casually tossed the mini bottle of food onto the bedside table.
Tian Xiwei quickly sat up, caught the small can with one hand, placed it on the bedside table, and then raised her right hand in front of her eyes.
She stared intently at her five delicate, white fingers!
Why should I answer?
That's a piece of junk!
"Tian Xiwei, what are you looking at your fingers for? Are you going or not?"
"Go, go, I'm going right now!"
Sweets can cure unhappiness.
Whenever she's in a bad mood, she craves sweets, especially canned yellow peaches.
However, the bottle that Li Shen brought her from afar was wrapped in layers of bubble wrap and had long been sealed in her suitcase.
After Tian Xiwei left, Li Shen picked up his speech and looked at it carefully.
Amidst this entire page of messy handwriting, there were once a few small hearts scattered throughout.
This was the gift she gave him, and also her greatest regret.
On graduation day, Tian Xiwei mustered up her courage, looking both cool and brave, and was willing to sacrifice her career to alleviate the original owner's romantic pressure by exposing her relationship!
However, the original owner was eventually overwhelmed by various pressures, chose to fulfill Tian Xiwei's future, and ultimately left.
Does this mean I don't love you?
This is selfless and profound love.
Li Shen was deeply moved and placed the speech draft face down on the table.
He picked up his pen and wrote a poem on the back of his speech.
After finishing writing, he added a line at the very bottom of the poem:
—My thoughts six years ago.
Li Shen carefully placed the page of his speech in his diary, then leaned back in his chair, pondering the question of Tian Xiwei's career path as a singer.
According to the program schedule, there will most likely be a guest appearance in the next few days.
This was a standard feature in previous seasons of the show.
In this guest performance, Li Shen hoped that Tian Xiwei would shine throughout the entire event.
As for her expansion into the film and television industry, Li Shen is waiting for another opportunity.
The door opened.
Tian Xiwei walked in carrying a large guitar bag.
When Li Shen opened his guitar case and took out his guitar, Tian Xiwei was lying on the bed, staring intently at the ceiling.
This time, she vowed to be absolutely strong! Not to shed a single tear!
Li Shen, holding his guitar, said, "This is the first time I've sung for you since we met."
Tian Xiwei was a little emotional: "After we reunited, the first song you sang wasn't for me, but for Brother Liang. I never expected that."
"Don't be jealous, you said it yourself, you'd be the one following behind the dogs with deep affection. Liang Ge has suffered so much, what's wrong with letting him have his way? This next song is dedicated to you from six years ago, the one who was so affectionate."
"Roar!"
Li Shen gently stroked the strings and slowly began to speak:
"If we make mistakes that we can afford to make..."
Miss out on everything that can be wrong.
It should still be time to repent.
If all of this were said out loud,
That little incident was easily forgotten with a laugh.
Tian Xiwei sighed softly and suddenly turned off the light.
Li Shen stopped singing and asked in confusion, "Is the power out?"
"No, I turned off the light."
Why turn off the lights?
Tian Xiwei recalled the scene a few days ago when she heard Li Shen sing "Time Difference" and she broke down emotionally.
She must not let anyone see her breakdown and cowardice!
She had a vague sense of unease, so she turned off the lights first!
She made an excuse: "I'm creating a concert atmosphere for you! Keep singing, it sounds great."
Actually, he changed one word in the lyrics above. The original lyrics were "If everything hadn't been said out loud," but he changed it to "If everything had been said out loud" to better fit the mood.
Li Shen plays the guitar, his gentle voice soothing and comforting.
"It's all my fault."
Silence when you shouldn't be silent, weakness when you should be brave.
If it weren't for me,
Misunderstanding that they are carefree makes us sad.
But the you of the past, and the me of now.
... "
Tian Xiwei suddenly covered her face with the blanket.
When Li Shen looked over, her fair right arm stretched out, holding a pink pig alarm clock. She shook the clock rhythmically.
The glow of the clock's markings and hands filled the room with warmth.
She's cheering him on.
Li Shen Shen's emotional performance:
"If that day,
Say what needs to be said properly.
Don't be stubborn about what you should be understanding about.
If I were that day,
Unaffected by emotions,
What would you do?
Tian Xiwei nestled in bed, the pink pig alarm clock in her hand swaying incessantly.
The blanket covering his head trembled slightly in the darkness.
The song was coming to an end.
"Unfortunately, there are no 'what ifs'."
Only the result remains.
Unfortunately, there are no "what ifs"!
The last verse lingered in my bedroom for a long time.
The two remained silent.
After a moment, Li Shen sighed deeply, "I sang really well."
Tian Xiwei, hidden under the covers: "???"
Li Shen put down his guitar: "This song is called 'Unfortunately, No Ifs,' it's for you, do you like it?"
Tian Xiwei nodded, her lips pressed tightly together, not uttering a sound, afraid that even the slightest sound would bring out the sob in her throat.
Her little head was covered by the summer quilt, and Li Shen could only see the quilt move slightly.
Snapped!
Li Shen turned on the light, walked to the bedside, and looked at Tian Xiwei, whose head was completely covered: "You really think this song is good?"
Tian Xiwei nodded repeatedly, causing the blanket on her forehead to rustle.
"Isn't it touching?"
"Mmm-hmm-hmm."
Li Shen laughed: "Let me see just how touching it is."
He tried to pull the blanket with both of his big hands, but Tian Xiwei's small hands held it firmly in place.
Li Shen, having failed to complete the task, said, "Now that this song is recorded, let's take a break."
Tian Xiwei asked in confusion, "Record? I don't have a phone!"
"I wasn't talking about you, I was talking about someone else."
Tian Xiwei: "Huh?"
"Zhang Ruonan, I'm talking to you!"
Zhang Ruonan, standing at the door, paused, then said through the door, "Ah! I came here to listen to songs, not anything else, really, I swear."
"Go back and rest."
"Okay! I swear, I really was just listening to music!"
The footsteps outside the door hurriedly disappeared.
Tian Xiwei asked in confusion, "How did you know she was outside?"
"How would I know? I just shouted it out randomly. After all, there have been two previous examples where she was always there when I sang."
"oh."
"Tian Xiwei, haven't you noticed? Every night after the recording ends, everyone rests, even the staff go home. But once Zhang Ruonan finds out about a guest's unusual behavior, she'll crawl out of bed to go to the set to watch the drama unfold. This angel of love is a workaholic."
The current crop of actresses born in the 95s are working incredibly hard; the competition is fierce. So, Tian Xiwei, do you understand what I mean?
"I will try my best!" Tian Xiwei raised her fair little fist.
"Work hard my ass! If working hard were useful, you wouldn't be the ones who became famous."
Just as Tian Xiwei raised her little fist, Li Shen suddenly pulled down the blanket.
Xia was pulled up to her neck, revealing Tian Xiwei's fair face and the large sunglasses on her face.
Beneath those large sunglasses, tear stains, not yet dried, clung to the sides of her nose.
Li Shen was startled: "You're covered by a blanket, and you're wearing sunglasses?"
Li Shen reached out to take off his sunglasses, but Tian Xiwei quickly pressed her hand down, saying, "Please give me some face, please give me some face."
Li Shen smiled, flicked Tian Xiwei's forehead, stood up, and sat back down in his chair.
"Tian Xiwei, let's get back to the previous topic. The competition among the post-95 actresses is too fierce now. Working hard? Everyone is working hard and fighting desperately. Our lives are precious, let them fight."
Making 10 bad dramas is not as good as making one good one. Just focus on self-improvement and honing your skills, and the rest will be fine—
Tian Xiwei: "Leave it to fate?"
"Leave it to me!"
"You're such a braggart, I can't listen to you anymore. Are you going to sing or not?" A voice came from outside the door.
Li Shen looked towards the doorway in confusion: "Li Hangliang???"
Li Shen opened the door and saw Li Hangliang leaning against the doorway, yawning: "Xiao Tian came to get the guitar. I knew you were going to sing again, and you have a new song. I got excited instantly. Then I went to find Zhang Ruonan and we all came over to listen."
"oh."
"Zhang Ruonan was still embarrassed, saying she was afraid of hearing other things. I told her, 'Don't think of us musicians as so dirty. When the mood strikes, we can sing all night long, and then...'"
Li Shen looked at him: "And then?"
"This song is beautiful, Father."